On the downhill slide to a new season...

(edited with Kim Klassen's elevate texture, hard light, 20% opacity)

I feel the waning away of summer.

The flowers are beginning to look tattered and heat weary.

I'm seeing pots of autumn mums in front of the stores.

We are on the downhill slide to a new season, on the calendar and in our lives.

I'm feeling a bit tattered and heat weary myself.

Packing up a house to move is pretty close to the top on the list of things I don't enjoy doing.

Yet, unpacking at our new to us house and making it into our home 

is near the top on the list of things I love to do.

That part can't come soon enough for me.

Meanwhile, I pack and I wait for all of the behind the scenes paperwork and transactions to be finished,

 praying for it all to go smoothly,

 and praying for myself to keep my heart filled with grace and patience!

(desat 20% then edited with Kim Klassen's day texture, hard light 40%)

still following,

texture-twist

songography at "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out"

image-in-ing:Variations

Admitting need, giving thanks...

Sometimes I get stubbornly self sufficient.  I don't say the words, "I need you",  easily to anyone but God.  I'm kind of an "I'll do it myself" gal.  Mama was like that.  In her sixties the neighbors caught her up on the roof of her house trying to fix something herself.  In her seventies, after the fact she admitted to me that she had climbed down in the crawl space under her house to deal with a clogged dryer hose.   I told her that maybe that wasn't such a good idea, seeing as no one knew she was under there and  since she lived alone, what if something had happened to her under there?  While I've not been up on any roofs or under any houses lately, I can be just as stubborn about refusing help in other areas.

Saturday, some of the ladies from our church drove to the beach for the day.  The weather was gray and drizzle-y, but any day by the sea is a good day in my opinion. We carpooled there in various cars, all of us stopping to have brunch together at a favorite restaurant on the way.  Once we got to the beach, the ladies formed unstructured groups. Everyone was free to do as they pleased, stroll on the beach, browse in the shops or even to just sit and sip coffee and chat.  I walked a bit on the beach with one gal, gathered a few more ladies along the way in the shops, and a group of five of us ended up renting a pedal driven buggy, having a seafood supper together, then, eventually, riding home together.  The day was filled with friendship and laughter.  While I have been readily accepting of help with packing boxes and other things related to our move,  I realize that I'm not one who likes to admit I need something more, something deeper.  I need friendship and laughter and heart sharing. Yet it seems so vulnerable to ask for that, to admit that life as a pastor's wife can be lonely, and that sometimes you need to just shed your role and be allowed to be one of the gang instead of some sort of "other".  The weather may have been gray yesterday, but the fellowship was colorful, bright and beautiful.  It was exactly what I needed.  I admit it, and I'm so thankful.

*******************

Since 2009 I've been counting my blessings thanks to the prompting of Ann Voskamp.

 I continue to count my thanks

piling up gratitude day by day

in my little green journal.

(and capturing some of my blessings via my camera or iPhone)

#6415-#6441

8-3-15-

-a sweet homemade card in the mail

-help getting my home office packed up

-a refreshing walk after a full day

8-4-15-

-starting the book of Proverbs

-many hands making the work of packing so much lighter

-help with some electrical repairs

-my oldest grandson spending the night 

8-5-15-

-my handyman son-in-law coming with me to meet with the inspector at our new house

-going to opening night of the Broadway production of Wicked here in Portland with my daughters,

 (a gift for my birthday)

8-6-15-

-waking up with peace after being stressed yesterday about the move

-my nephew's help 

-a son-in-the-Lord's help

-getting a dreaded list of to-dos done

-a really good prayer time at church

8-7-15-

-more packing help

-so much good stuff in the book of Proverbs

-the hub's texting me from Ghana that home is wherever I am

8-8-15-

-a fun day at the beach with the ladies from our church

-so much laughter

-renting a buggy and pedaling and laughing our way around town

-taking my friend to see our new house on the ride home

-a friend's help to meet a goal

8-9-15-

-the powerful Holy Spirit

-God speaking to our church, "you can do this"

-God working in us

-video of our granddaughter singing at the church in Kumasi, Ghana

-spending the afternoon catching up on my Bible reading and journaling

gratefully yours, 

Brooding...

Moving is chaotic.  Our home of sixteen years doesn't feel like ours anymore with most everything that made it unique to us packed in boxes that we have to weave our way around like a rat manipulating its way through a maze.  A new owner waits for the day she signs her name to the final documents and gets the keys to this home that used to be ours.  The home we're buying sits empty, waiting to be filled with life and living and love, but it's not officially ours yet, either.  We're in limbo, living in chaos and mess. Financial documents have been delivered to the appropriate parties to affirm that we are, indeed, responsible home buyers.  Inspectors have crawled through the attics and underbellies of both homes,  revealing every flaw they can find to avoid unpleasant surprises about what we're buying.  Appraisals are getting scheduled.  Closing dates dangle temptingly in front of us, like the proverbial carrot on the end of a stick.

I think about our new to us home.  I think about what it will look like with the new wood floors we hope to put in, some different light fixtures, some paint.  Mostly though, I think about this fall and imagine us all moved in, my favorite red soup pot simmering on the stove with something delicious inside, family and friends gathered round the kitchen and family room.  I think about the life we'll live there, the loving that will take place in those walls.

I don't do chaos well.  I'm a person who thrives on peace, on neatness, on order.  In this messy season, I've had to cling hard to the peace of God, had to lean on Him  to keep myself from flinging my frustration out on any and all innocent victims within range of my verbal assault.  After the inspection on our future home, I went to bed that night thinking maybe we had made a huge mistake.  Though everyone who looked at the report assured me there was nothing unusual or horrible on it, seeing thirty pages of every little thing you could think of that is flawed with this place you are investing all of your hard won equity into was daunting.  And did I mention that my husband happens to be half a world away on a long planned trip to Ghana, West Africa?  Yes, we had no idea that all of this would happen simultaneously when he scheduled the trip.  Maybe it's for the best, so he doesn't have to put up with my occasional freaking out episodes.  Well, there have been some panicky texts and calls back and forth, truth be told.  This is a lot to cope with solo.

God's great grace has been evident as well, though.  The morning after the house inspection, I woke up with a shift in perspective, with an unexplainable peace.  Last night, at our church's weekly prayer meeting, praise erupted like a fountain, out of the depths of my spirit, bypassing my tumultuous emotions and my mind filled with lists of things needing to be done.  I've sensed the Spirit hovering, brooding, over the stormy chaos of my life.  Like a mother hen, sitting on her eggs, brooding, waiting for new life to spring forth,  I sense the Spirit whispering, "Behold, I am doing a new thing!", and I know in the depths of my being that it is so much more than a new location.  He's positioning me for something I can't see yet, but I sense it there past the horizon, and I know it's going to be good.

still following,

Also happily linking up with the lovely Lisha Epperson 

and Cheryl McCain Photography.

Fun with flowers...

(edited with Kim Klassen's 2203 texture, hardlight texture, 30% opacity)

A pretty birthday bouquet from a friend at church, plopped into my rustic old watering can, 

tempted me away from packing up for our move to take some photos.

(no texture)

As if it takes much to tempt me away from packing!

We've been in our current home for 16 years, so it's been a good long while 

since I've had to do all work involved with selling a home, buying a home, or packing up a home.

Now I get to do all of the above.

(edited with Kim Klassen's everyday texture, hard light)

I'm trying to keep my eye on the prize of making a new to us house into our home.

(edited with Kim Klassen's elevate texture, lighten 25% opacity)

Meanwhile, a little photo shoot and some photo editing was a good distraction for a little while.

(edited with Kim Klassen's 1412 texture, hard light, 60% opacity)

still following,

texture-twist

songography at "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out"

image-in-ing:Variations

Birthday blessings...

Today is my fifty eighth birthday.  (How did I get here?  Wow!  Life zooms by too fast!) My husband is in Ghana, West Africa with a team from our church that includes, among others, my second born daughter, our oldest granddaughter and our youngest grandson.  As you can see, our grandson is quite a hit and seems to be a natural born missionary like his mama and siblings.

I was dreading this birthday with my husband so far away, but my family, friends and church family made the day so special for me.  I received cards, flowers and a gift card from the people in our church.  My oldest grandson who, along with his daddy, were unable to make the trip to Ghana with the rest of their family due to work/sports,  brought me flowers and a card just from him.  They went to lunch with me after church along with my nephew and his family and some friends.  I got lots of calls and texts throughout the day from my daughters and siblings.  I'm so thankful that communication is so worldwide now, so I talked to and texted my husband, granddaughter and daughter in Ghana and received a text from my far away missionary brother as well.

Today resulted in a much needed shift in my focus.  As we are going through the transition of selling the home we've lived in for over 16 years and buying a new to us home in Vancouver, Washington my focus was too much centered there.  Today my focus was brought back to how richly blessed I am to have open access to Father God through Jesus Christ and to be blessed with love and relationships with family and friends.  I am blessed.  I have so much to be thankful for.

*******************

Since 2009 I've been counting my blessings thanks to the prompting of Ann Voskamp.

 I continue to count my thanks

piling up gratitude day by day

in my little green journal.

(and capturing some of my blessings via my camera or iPhone)

#6386-#6414

7-27-15-

-a family of raccoons in a parade across the street

-a fun dinner to look at the wedding photos with our youngest daughter, son-in-law and his parents

(photos by Sweetmint Photography, Portland, Oregon)

(youngest daughter and her husband)

(oldest granddaughter)

youngest grandson

(middle granddaughter)

(our three girls)

(youngest granddaughter)

(our son-in-law and oldest grandson)

-listening to our son-in-law's old Keith Green album on vinyl record

7-28-15-

-an afternoon with our middle granddaughter while our daughter brought her little sister to the dr.

-taking her to the same park I grew up playing at

-telling the grandgirlies stories about when I was a kid

7-29-15-

-finishing the book of Ephesians and starting the book of Acts with the 365 days of truth Bible reading plan

-the amazing Word of God

-a not too bad inspection report on our house

7-30-15-

-a good heart talk

-putting an offer on a house 

-a good lunch together

-a birthday celebration with the family before the Ghana trip

-tickets to go see the Broadway show "Wicked" with my girls

7-31-15-

-time with my brother

-our house offer accepted!

-my sister's heart procedure going well

-helping my oldest daughter with house chores and the girls since she caught the youngest one's strep

8-1-15-

-a phone call from my hubs saying they arrived safely in Kumasi, Ghana

-taking the two youngest granddaughters to the splash park so my daughter can rest

-going to bed early after a hectic last few days

8-2-15-

-my 7am text from my hubs to wake up, just like he does every Sunday morning from his church office,

 even though today he's in Ghana

-flowers and a birthday card from Malachi

-birthday cards, flowers and a gift card from our church family

-birthday lunch with friends and family

-birthday texts/calls from all my girls

-birthday calls and texts from my siblings

-a dear friend that I haven't seen or heard from in almost 20 years finding me on Facebook

-our oldest granddaughter's lost luggage found

gratefully yours, 

A new thing...

I'm not a big fan of big changes.  I'm a person who likes my routine, my home, my familiar surroundings.  Even a much anticipated vacation is precipitated with a feeling of hesitation about leaving home as I'm packing. Every. Single. Time.

I was born right outside of Portland, Oregon.  When God called my husband and I to a church in Portland 18 years ago, my roots grew deep in the familiar soil of the city I'd always known and loved.  Six years ago, our church in Portland merged with a church in Vancouver, Washington.  Five years ago, we moved the church to Vancouver and prepared for our son-in-law to plant a church in southeast Portland with a core group of people from our sending church.  We, in essence, passed the torch that God had placed in us for Portland to him.  So, we've been pastoring our church in Vancouver, but were still living in our cozy little home in Portland.  I still walked/jogged two loops around my neighborhood 4 or 5 days a week, like I'd always done.  I still drove my familiar habitrails to the bank, store, and my favorite thrift and antique stores in Portland.  Meanwhile, my husband commuted back and forth to Vancouver six days a week.  "It makes sense for us to move to Vancouver,"  he often said, but I was dragging my feet inside.  

Less than a month ago we finally put our home on the market.  House values are up and the market is hot in Portland.  It sold in under three weeks.  I felt anxious, unsettled, unsure.  I walked my neighborhood and said my goodbyes and shed my tears.  We found a home and made an offer but lost the house to another offer due to some rather unethical things the selling agent did. I wrestled with that one, feeling confused why God allowed that to happen.  I struggled about leaving my beloved city, though in reality I wasn't going to be living much farther from it than the little town I had been born and raised in.  Somehow, being across the Columbia River and in a whole other state made it seem farther.  

Today,  we were notified that our offer was accepted on a home we saw yesterday.  I didn't think we were going to find a house we liked as well as the first home we made an offer on and lost, but I guess God knows better.  Your prayers for a smooth closing for the buyer of our home, and for us, would be appreciated.

I don't know when it happened, but sometime, somehow, God made a shift in my heart.  It feels like I finally let go here, and am actually ready and anticipating the new thing God has for us. 

still following,

P.S. I've not been on my regular posting schedule this week, and have been slow to respond to your comments,  due to house hunting and other related busyness, which will probably continue over the next month.  Thank you for your patience with me.

Also happily linking up with the lovely Lisha Epperson 

and Cheryl McCain Photography.