Isn't this eucharisteo, this giving thanks, gratitude gathering, counting my blessings,
supposed to teach me to give thanks at all times, to give thanks continually?
And yet, for several hours today, instead of giving thanks I got angry.
I got angry at God.
He wasn't doing things when I thought He should, or how I thought He should,
and I am oh, so weary with waiting.
He gently reminded me of my word for the year, endurance,
and of the promises He has for me as the result of enduring.
I didn't tell Him He could have His dumb, old word of the year back,
but I did tell Him I was sick and tired of it!
And then I begged Him to speak to me in some way,
to let me know He was still on the job,
that He hadn't forgotten me here in this place of wanting more than what I'm experiencing now.
I opened my Bible to Psalms 33-35,
today's chapters as I'm reading through the Bible with 365 Days of Truth.
Here's some highlights of what He said to me through His Word-
-praise "befits" the upright
(befits means is fitting for, and I was grumbling instead)
-all His work is done in faithfulness
(God cannot not be faithful!)
-when God speaks it happens
-God's eye is on me
-I need to set my hope on His steadfast love
-I need to set my soul, (mind, will and emotions), to wait for Him
-my heart should be glad in Him
(not just glad when everything is easy and going my way)
-my hope needs to be in Him
(not in circumstances changing or in others or my abilities)
And He spoke to me through the words
AT ALL TIMES
Praise and thanksgiving isn't just a feel good activity,
in fact, when I don't feel like it is when I need it the most.
I'm thankful that God loves me enough to gently correct me and remind me of that.
Since 2009 I've been counting my blessings thanks to the prompting of Ann Voskamp.
I continue to count my thanks
piling up gratitude day by day
in my little green journal.
(and capturing some of my blessings via my camera or iPhone)
-the way the morning coffee that my hub's makes tastes best
-video of my youngest grandson saying "Mama"!
-clearance prices on some things we needed for my daughter's wedding
-"you are my only love" text from my hubs
-the wedding invitations turned out great!
-my sister sent my mama's hankie for my daughter to carry in her wedding
as her something old and something blue
-God ordering my day
-even having time to write
-dinner and good conversation with a family from church
-youngest daughter and her fiancé hanging out at our house
-the sun warming me through the car window
-the blessing of my camera and the enjoyment photography gives me
-devotions in my car in between appointments
-the hubs and I relaxing and watching a movie together
-going to our two oldest grands spring program
-the hub and I going into cardiac icu to pray for one of our young mamas from church
who had open heart surgery and the nurse saying, "we believe in prayer here"
-sweet photos and videos of our two youngest granddaughters
-texts of our busy youngest grandson emptying mama's clean laundry basket all over the living room
-the hub's help with some chores
-taking a nap
-a walk in the rain
-our youngest grandson giving me kisses
-our oldest grandson hanging out with us after church
-God speaking to me clearly and lovingly through His word