I say it jokingly.
We, (meaning me and my siblings), don't have an athletic bone in our bodies, but we have brains!
Every one of us.
I didn't say we're always wise you will notice.
But, in the I.Q. department I would say we're all above average.
And I've been proud of it.
And I've leaned on it, too much, too, too much.
It really wears a body out,
ruminating, reasoning, analyzing,
using the mind to figure out the best path through life,
which way I can go that will result in the least collateral damage,
and figuring out how to get those around me to see it the same way.
I want them to walk the path I have analyzed and reasoned out is the best, the safest, makes the most sense.
They just don't cooperate, these others with minds of their own.
Me, I've figured it all out, and it seems so black and white and simple.
I'm not talking Bible here, because if you believe, you know there's One Way and Only One.
I'm talking about everyday life and the way my mind works,
and how it fusses and fumes and figures out how I can take the path of least resistance,
the path most likely to keep everyone happy and safe and getting along.
Inside, I'm frustrated with the others who refuse to walk the way I think is best.
I'm frustrated that they don't seem to see what makes sense to my mind.
I've read it at least a hundred times.
But today, God took out that sharp, two edged sword of His, and cleaved me right open with it.
DO NOT RELY ON YOUR OWN INSIGHT OR UNDERSTANDING…
BE NOT WISE IN YOUR OWN EYES…
IT SHALL BE HEALTH TO YOUR NERVES AND SINEWS,
MARROW AND MOISTENING TO YOUR BONES…
Could it be so?
Could this tied up in knots feeling within me be, not due to others and what I deem to be their unwise choices in life, but due to the fact that I'm relying on my own insight, understanding and wisdom to get me through the day?
Could this chronic pain, myofascial pain syndrome, fibromyalgia, whatever fancy name the doctor wants to give it, be tied to my compulsion to figure everything out?
Health to my nerves and sinews, marrow and moistening to my bones.
That's what I need.
And the how is to lean on, trust in, be confident in, the Lord,
to know, recognize and acknowledge Him in all my ways.
So, this mind of mine, surely should be smart enough to realize that He's smarter than me and His ways are better than mine.
Maybe the most liberating words I can utter are,
"I don't know, but You do, God.
Now, show me the way."
To quit relying on my brains and start relying on His is the smartest choice I can make.