Thursday, December 17, 2015

On being needed...


While I was doing my Christmas grocery shopping the other day, stocking up on the items I would need for baking Christmas goodies, I had an overwhelming sense of missing my mama.  I thought about how much she would have liked to come over and see our new home, how she'd be happy for me that I now have the big open kitchen/dining room I always wanted.  She would smile that I no longer have to try to function in the wee little kitchen of our former home.  I wished she could come over and just sit and visit with me while I did the Christmas baking, even if she wasn't up to helping much. With the missing her, came the knowledge that, at age 58, I was needing my mama, and I wondered if I'd ever told her that.  Did I ever tell my mama that I'd never outgrow needing her?  I didn't need her help with the baking, I didn't need her for what she could do for me, I needed her for what she was to me.   I fear that in her later years, when she was the one needing my help, that I lost sight of all this.

Knowing that we're wanted is, I believe, a fundamental key to emotional health.  I'm fond of telling my grandkids, of all of the six year olds, (insert age of whatever one I happen to be talking to at the moment), in the whole wide world were lined up in a big long line and God said, pick whichever one you want as your granddaughter/grandson, I would always choose you.  But, as we age I think there comes a time when it's nice to know that we're not just wanted, but that we're still needed.  Now, obviously there's an unhealthy needing.  If my grown/independent kids still need me to pay their bills and clean up after them, that's unhealthy.  However, to know that you're a valuable and necessary part of someone's life, in the family circle, in the church, is important in my opinion.  Mama's been in heaven five years now, so I can no longer tell her that I need her, but there are a lot of people in my life that it's not too late for me to tell that they are a much wanted, much needed, important part of my life.

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19 comments:

  1. Oh, how your words can shoot straight to my heart! They always seems to come at the very exact time that I truly need to read them. I am missing my beautiful sweet mom this season as well. I haven't really been able to fully comprehend all the swirling emotions inside of me until I read this just now. As always you are spot on. There are those still in our earthly life that we can let know that they are treasured, special & much needed in our lives. You, my friend, are one of those very people that I am thankful for God bringing into my life. Praying that you & yours have a very blessed & Merry Christmas.

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    1. Thank you so much. You bless and encourage me to keep on writing!

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  2. Wise woman, thank you for this reminder. xo

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  3. Elizabeth, you're right.... my mom's been gone over 20 years and I miss her most at Christmas.
    I like these lines, " However, to know that you're a valuable and necessary part of someone's life, in the family circle, in the church, is important in my opinion."
    Good reminder, friend.

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    1. Jody, I needed to remind myself, I think.

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  4. Oh,Elizabeth, this brought tears. My dad's been gone over 20 years but I still have my 93 yr. old mother. I don't tell her enough how much I love and need her. I'm going to make it a point to do it more. Thank you!

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    1. Gayl, what a blessing to know this encouraged you.

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  5. Your words touch my heart deeply. As I care for my dear, little mother who needs me it's easy to lose sight how much I need her. To be needed is what we all long for. I'm blessed by you, dear friend - and I need you in my life. Coming here to hear your heart makes a difference in my day!
    ~Adrienne~

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    1. To be needed is what we long for...yes!

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  6. Your words touch my heart deeply. As I care for my dear, little mother who needs me it's easy to lose sight how much I need her. To be needed is what we all long for. I'm blessed by you, dear friend - and I need you in my life. Coming here to hear your heart makes a difference in my day!
    ~Adrienne~

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  7. This so touched me today! Thank you.

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    1. Barbie, you are such a needed voice of love and encouragement online...keep on keeping on friend, keep on writing.

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  8. so beautiful, my friend. Sending a hug.

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  9. Beautiful...as always!!! And now would be a good time tell you, "Your blog
    is needed and wanted by your readers!!!" I always feel a peace after reading it...you have a gift. Thank you!!!
    Bless You,
    Addie

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  10. I want to share this with every young person!
    So touching and beautiful.

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