Today is your birthday.
You made me a mama when I wasn't much more than a child myself,
just shy of my twentieth birthday.
There are no words to describe the way I loved you from the very start,
but maybe I'll try.
I loved you fiercely.
This was no mamby-pamby, ooey-gooey, sissy type love,
this was full blown mama bear love.
It flooded my heart the minute I saw you with your head of thick dark hair
and your dimpled cheeks.
It's power surprised me.
You're a grown married woman now, with children of your own.
Surely you understand now what I mean.
Being a mama is a wonderful and terrifying thing.
It changed and shaped me in the best ways while it exposed my weaknesses in the worst ways.
My frequent prayer was, "God, please cover my mistakes with Your grace".
Yesterday, you asked me to watch your girls for a few hours while you attended a meeting.
While the two year old napped, the five year old and I played a game of dominos,
then a hand of Go Fish followed by a hand of Old Maid.
We ended up snuggled up together on my bed while I read One Morning in Maine to her.
While we read about Sal and her lose tooth I commented, that at age five, she'll probably lose a tooth soon as well.
A few moments later she burst out, "Nana, this is the best day!"
My heart burst with the love I felt for your firstborn girl,
and it was a wee bit like getting to live a moment with you at age five all over again.
It just goes by so gosh darn fast.
I wish I'd played more dominos and hands of Go Fish and Old Maid and read more
Robert McCloskey classics to you and worried a lot less about my list of to-dos.
But I can't go back, and looking at you, I guess God's grace did cover my weakness,
because you're pretty amazing.
You are beautiful in every way and I am so proud of you.
I am proud to be your mama.
It would be wonderful to have my name on the cover of a book someday,
or even on an article in a magazine,
but if all I'm ever know as is your mama, your sisters' mama,
your daughters' nana, or your sisters' childrens' nana,
I'm okay with that.
Because it's been a high privilege,
a high honor,
and the greatest blessing from God I've ever known.
Also joining THOUGHT PROVOKING THURSDAYS
at 3-D Lessons for Life